Don't Don't Break the Chain... Make the Chain!

Make the chain!
(source: Wikipedia)

One of the worst productivity tips I've ever heard came from Jerry Seinfeld.  Here's the "tip": never skip a day of work.  Specifically, as a comedian-writer Seinfeld's goal was to write as much as possible.  To this end, he marked a calendar with a big red "X" for every day he worked.  After a few days of this, a chain of X's would form.  Then came the productivity goal: "Don't break the chain."

I've tried this trick for some activities and I've found it to be a terrible piece of advice.  Here's why: I always failed.  Eventually, I broke the chain.  Eventually, life reared up and made it impossible to stick with a habit.  Something always comes up: illness, events, deadlines, fatigue.  And guess what?  Failing sucks!

The problem with "Don't Break the Chain" is that it is an avoidance goal: it frames a goal or habit as something not to do.  The problem with this is that doesn't describe the behavior that one should be doing and leaves too much room for failure, as I've described.

Instead, I propose the following counter to Seinfeld's tip: "Make a chain."  Track every time you do something.  Make a check mark. Stick a sticker.  Put a coin in a jar. Whatever.  Just give yourself credit for every time you do it right and keep track of how many times you did it.  In this case, it doesn't matter if you skip a day.  Pick up the next day, or the next.  Or the next week.  Small failures don't matter if your goal is to make a huge chain; just pick up where you left off.

This has worked great for me while I've taken up running.  At first, I got all bummed out when I missed a day of my running plan: I broke the chain.  But then I reframed the goal as "make the chain" and now I can never fail.  If I miss a day, I just pick up where I left off.  Each workout I complete, I cross it off.  I see a permanent record of my progress that cannot be taken away.

Stay happy :)

My Creative Anxiety

What if no one likes it?

For me, the number one barrier to producing anything new or working on new projects that excite me is creative anxiety.  For some reason, the act of trying to create something can be extremely anxiety-producing.    

This blog has been a perfect example of this phenomenon in action. I started off extremely motivated, pumping out post after post, but the entire time there was a nagging uncertainty in the back of my mind.  This version of my Homunculus was fond of terrifying questions like: "Is this really a good idea?", "What if no one likes the blog?", "What if friends, family, or coworkers think you're strange for writing about this stuff?", and on and on.

After time, the initial excitement faded but this nasty, pessimistic voice inside remained.  The inertia waned, and writing ground to a halt.  My last post on the blog was two months ago. And I begin to weep.

However, I take some solace in knowing that I'm not the only one with this issue.  For example, in this great TED talk, Eat, Pray, Love author Elizabeth Gilbert describes one strategy for dealing with creative anxiety: take the pressure off yourself by ascribing creativity to a Muse.  Perhaps a Homunculus would be a better metaphor?  I digress.

Another perspective on this issue comes from Seth Godin in this series on starting a new venture.  I was struck by how Seth kept reinforcing that the essential step in starting a business is to become comfortable putting your idea out in the open.  Fear of judgement or fear of failure are the primary obstacles to starting a business.  In this context, creative anxiety shifts from being a problem of the artists and writers to a real-world problem that gets in the way of our success.

Unfortunately, I don't think there is any cure for this issue.  Rather, I fear we must simply become numb to the difficult emotions and soldier on, working despite the discomfort that comes with being truly creative.  I will try to remind myself that, while the process of creating can be very unnerving, the finished product often makes it all worth it. 

The Mental Reboot Script

Time to reboot.

There's no way around it - the grind has been grinding you down.  You're tired, you're stressed, your motivation is low.  Sometimes life can be really tough and, lately, life has been really tough.

But bad times ebb and flow, come and go.  Sometimes things are tough, other times things are great.  Perhaps the tough times seem to happen more than the good times, but it's hard to know for sure.  When you're stressed it's difficult to keep perspective.

Situations can change though, and situations change faster if you make an effort to move forward, to make progress.  Who cares if you only make a little change today for the better?  At least it's a step in the right direction.  One small change to make life better is all you need to feel some hope.  Who knows?  Maybe this is the beginning of a period of incredible success.  Until you get started, you'll never know.

So get focused.  Don't let all the nagging stressors creep into your mind all at once.  You can only do one thing at a time.  Just pick something to do that would make a difference in your life and start working on it.  Pick something small, manageable and doable and just get it done.  No more worrying about picking the perfect thing to do, just trust your instincts and make progress.  Block out all other intruding worries and attack that one thing that will make you feel the most accomplished.

Oh, and please? Give yourself a break when you're done?  In order to make real, lasting progress you're going to want to stick to your goals.  Most things that need to be done take some time to happen, so let's not burn out.  After a full day of focused effort, you deserve to relax, rest and recover.  Your brain is an organ and a day of hard work is like a mental workout: you need some recovery time to be ready for the next day.

And while we're on the topic, don't lose sight of all the good stuff you have going on.  There are things that bring you joy even if they are little, simple things like McDonald's breakfast sandwiches.  Look around and remind yourself about a few things that make life fun and enjoyable.

Feeling better?  Good.  But, don't beat yourself up about getting down in the dumps from time to time.  It happens to everyone.  The important thing is to keep an eye on those nasty thoughts and be sure to reboot when things get out of hand.

S.M.A.R.T. Goals Are Dumb

Dream small.

If you've ever been exposed to any goal-setting advice of any kind, you've probably heard of S.M.A.R.T. goals, an acronym which stands for Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, and Timely.  I'd like to add one more adjective: overwhelming.

Who has the time and energy to craft a series of SMART goals and then track progress in great detail? I'm a nerd, but there are only so many excel spreadsheets I can create before I feel ashamed.

Also, what happens if you think you've created a SMART goal, but realize it's not "attainable" or too "timely"?  I know what happens to me: I feel like monkey poo.

SMART goals are also dumb because when they are too "big picture", they cause anxiety.  For example, when I think about some Big Goal, even when it may fit into the SMART paradigm, I get overwhelmed. I get discouraged. I get pessimistic.

What's the solution?  Actually, I think it's a combination of Big, but Vague, goals and small SMART micro-goals that are designed to bring us one step closer to that Big Vague Goal.  This concept of micro-goals is shown to be effective in everything from making tough changes, to procrastination, to extreme physical challenges like training for the Navy Seals.

Why does this work?  Because you can design the micro-goals to be so stupid easy, you are guaranteed to succeed. So, we shouldn't make some huge-ass SMART goal that seems impossible (even if it's not). Instead, we do something so tiny that it seems ridiculously easy (run for 5 minutes).  Then, we do it and feel awesome.  This creates a positive-feedback loop: set more tiny goals, kick ass, repeat.  As long as these tiny, micro-goals are pointed in the general direction of the Big Vague Goal, we're basically guaranteed to come close to our Big Vague Goal over time.

To be fair SMART isn't all bad, setting specific, measureable, attainable, realistic, and timely goals is essentially what I suggest we do: easy goals are all of those things.  But I would add one more essential criteria: small. The smallness takes the overwhelming scale out of the equation. So, SMARTS goal-setting is the way to go for me, but that's an awkward acronym and it's easier to just say SMART goals are dumb.

Comfortable with the Uncomfortable

Uncomfortable? Yes.  Smart? No.

When I'm bad at something, I feel like 10 pounds of shit in a 5 pound bag.  In other words, making mistakes makes me really uncomfortable.

Unfortunately for my feelings though, becoming comfortable with the uncomfortable may be the single most important thing I can do to become a better person.  Researchers and educators are beginning to appreciate that embracing failure and learning from our mistakes is a critical skill if we want to be our best.  And that appreciation is beginning to catch on in the popular press.

For example, when the New York Times Magazine published "What if the Secret to Success is Failure?", the piece quickly became one of the most emailed articles.  But it didn't stop there.  A month later, Kathleen Parker of the Washington Post reminded us "How we succeed by failing" and Jonah Lehrer pointed out that mistakes explain "Why [...] Some People Learn Faster".

Soon bloggers picked up the scent: Zen Habits suggested we face our failings (and in public) and LifeHacker showed geeks like me "How to Identify and Learn from Your Mistakes".  The punchline: coming face-to-face with our failings is essential to improve on them.  By putting our heads in the sand, we may feel better in the short term, but in the long term nothing changes.  If we're lucky, the ostrich strategy will allow us to feel all warm and fuzzy about ourselves.  If we're unlucky, our failings will come up and bite us.

Intellectually, I think we all appreciate that we need to work on our weak points to get better.  But all this great advice misses a critical reality: it sucks to suck.  Being bad at things is emotionally painful.

So what do we do?  My vote: train our brain to like the pain.  Not all uncomfortable things are bad, and we have the ability to re-label feelings consciously so that our feelings of pain become badges of honor.  So, instead of reacting to discomfort with "this sucks", we can tag on an addendum: "this sucks but look how tough I am".

Put simply: discomfort is proof we're willing to become better.  Being willing to withstand some pain shows that we're ready to change.  From now on, every time I make a mistake and feel like an idiot, I'm going to embrace the feeling: if I weren't pushing myself then I wouldn't be making mistakes.

Is working hard a talent?

Working hard, or hardly working?

Being the best: is it hard-work or talent...  The topic seems to make internet-blogger-types get all giddy with excitement.  O!  The back and forth; the opinions and convictions.  So dramatic, who is right?

Of course, after all that, some wise-ass chimes-in and states the obvious: "everyone is right!"  Buzz-kill; but, true.

Aha! But I have a new, totally fantastic way of thinking about the issue that is certain to make the "Hard Work is King" crowd cringe.  I raise this question: what if the ability to work hard is a talent?

The problem is that all the talking heads out there look at working-hard as something independent of our brains; like hard work isn't a behavior that happens because our brains/minds make it happen.  Whoa, are we saying that our souls have to get involved now and whip up a frothy batch of free-will so that we can work hard and become a bad-ass?  We aren't becoming dualists here are we?

The ability to work hard is just that, an ability.  Working hard takes a ton of cognitive awesomeness, much of which is influenced by both genetics and our environment.  Let's enumerate some of the metacognitive ninja-skillz necessary to work hard, shall we?

First, we must exert significant impulse control, because we can't be distracted by extraneous information and influences.  Second, we must have the ability to recognize errors as they happen and generate creative solutions.  Third, we must demonstrate resilience and optimism so we can overcome our failures and keep working.  Fourth, we must know when and how to seek out the advice and feedback of others so that we don't fall into repeated patterns of behavior.  Fifth, we must have some motivation to work hard, otherwise, working hard is just dumb.

I'm worried about my genes.

Wow, when I spell it all out like that, the simple dichotomy of hard-work vs. talent breaks down.  Instead, hard-work becomes an ability all it's own that is not easily dissociated from a number of underlying cognitive capacities.  Isn't this fun?  Now we can start to ask more specific questions: is impulse control learned or innate?  Is optimism learned or innate?  Yes, the answer to questions like these will be "both", but at least then we can start to tease out strategies for working with what we have.

Maybe one day the debate will end.  Mr. Science will send me a nice letter indicating that I don't have "that gene" and I should give up science and become a monkey-trainer because, by way of some Gattica-like sorting process, that's what I'm programmed to do.  Until then, I can't change my genes, so worrying about "talent" is a waste of my time.  Instead, I'm going to work as hard as I can to improve my ability to work hard, because that's all I can do.

This Is For You

I'm going strong this week: pushing out the work like a man possessed.  Why? Cuz, I've got the skillz to pay the proverbial bills when it comes to conquering procrastination.  For starters, I'm focused on productivity, not procrastination, because that's what approach goals are all about.  Also, I'm treating work like a game to get into the zone, and reminding myself of the bigger picture to stay motivated.  Finally, I'm taking breaks and scheduling not-working because life would stink otherwise.  But all this has been about me, me, me.  If i'm really going to conquer procrastination, I need to make it about more than just me.

Do it for them.

That's right.  There's nothing more motivating than having someone to work hard for. It can be a child or a spouse, a mom or a brother.  It doesn't even have to be a family member: anyone you respect can be someone to work hard for.  Your boss.  Your mentor.  Your colleagues.

Today, increase your motivation by surrounding yourself with objects and images that remind you of the people who depend on you.  When you see their smiling faces, or the objects that remind you of them, you'll get back to work real quick.  Fo' sho.

Unschedule

Time to get this Week of Productivity, Level 2 back on track.  Previously, we played around with some Daily Mind Games that were designed to get our motivation up, get us in the zone, and make getting things done fun. Today, we're switching from overt productivity to a psychological trick to make ourselves work harder with less pain.  It's time to put ourselves first!

All work and no play...

When it comes to productivity, often the problem is that we're too hard on ourselves: we push ourselves too hard.  I do this all the time.  I think the answer to getting more out of myself is to keep pushing the pace.  Unfortunately, all that drive for more, more, more creates feelings of self-resentment, burn-out, and even fear.

Instead, when I schedule times for recovery, relaxation and reward, I am much more likely to work without resentment and burn-out.  Paradoxically, by putting pleasure first our work sessions will be more effective, because we can see a light at the end of the tunnel and can pick a more appropriate pace.

Kudos

A scheduled break.

My homunculus has been doing such a great job this week, I think he deserves a little reward.  First, the little fella got all positive about his goals for me.  Next, he became all excited when I made my to-do list into a game.  And, yesterday, he was all pumped up after I reminded him of what all the work was about.  Yes, Homunky has been cooperating, so I think a little treat is in order... After we get just a tiny bit more work done.

One of the more demoralizing aspects of most jobs is that it seems that the work is endless.  It just keeps coming with no end in sight!  Even thinking about that fact makes me squirm a little bit.  So, in order to avoid going all cra-cra it helps me to set scheduled work-bouts followed by a scheduled break, or some other reward, for a job-well-done.  Knowing that I have something to look forward to (in my case, some time to goof-off) makes me much more likely to stay focused.

Kudos

Task: Reward yourself for predetermined lengths of focused work.

Info: Depending on my level of motivation, I typically settle on either half-hour or hour-long bouts of work followed by 10-15min bouts of fun.  This strategy is most useful for tasks that are really hard to get started, like long, written documents.  When I promise myself a break after a certain amount of work, I'm much more likely to get started because I know the pain won't last forever!  The more nasty the task is, the shorter the work periods and the longer the break periods should be in order to overcome the inertia of getting started.  Finally, stick to your break schedule!  Even if you're in the zone, I'm of the opinion that working for longer that promised causes some amount of self-resentment.  Instead, take the scheduled break and make the next work-period a little longer.

Goal: Get started on an onerous task using a reward as a motivator.

Don't forget! If you subscribe to The Happy Homunculus by RSS, email, ortwitter, you'll stay up-to-date on all the Daily Mind Games!

To-do to Goal

Our to-do list as a game: it's a fun, mental trick to help us make it though a day of arduous tasks.  However, eventually, treating our tasks as a game is going to lose its luster.  Even the most fun games can become tiresome after time, especially once we've plateaued, because they seem arbitrary.  Once we "beat" the game, why continue to play without greater meaning?  So, we must layer on an additional trick of motivation to keep our work-day fresh.  Today let's give our to-do list purpose.

What's the goal?

A common problem I experience is that I often lose sight of the bigger picture when I'm trying to get stuff done.  I start to go through the motions, checking things off a list I made, without remembering the reason for an individual task.  My list becomes a generic "inbox", and once items make it into the list, I often just do them without giving it much thought.

However, this lack of "purpose" is a quick path to procrastination.  Why work without a reason? So, today, let's go through our list of things to do and link each element with a larger goal.  What goal does the task address?

To-do to Goal

Task: Assign a larger goal to each item on your to-do list.

Info: This is an easy DMG.  At the end of each task, in parenthesis, come up with some larger purpose or goal that is associated with the task.  For this exercise, the "bigger picture" the better.  You want to remind yourself of the reason you're doing something in the first place.  When I do this, I'm quickly motivated to push through and get to work, because now I have a reason to do so.

Goal: Increase motivation by giving your work purpose.

Don't forget! If you subscribe to The Happy Homunculus by RSS, email, or twitter, you'll stay up-to-date on all the Daily Mind Games!

Approach

Approach.

OK, the good news is that my homunculus is on-board:  "Listen boss, no more procrastinating, you hear?  If you waste any more time, I'm going to get really cranky and that will be bad news for you."  However, the really bad news is that my homunculus is a terrible motivator.  Why?  Because he's framing our goal as an avoidance goal: something NOT to do.  Unfortunately, thinking about something, even in a negative way, is just giving the bad-thing too much of our valuable attention.  Time to re-frame the problem.

Goals can be thought of in two ways: avoidance (don't, stop, no) and approach (do, go, yes).  For example, I could say to myself: "Self, stop procrastinating."  I could also say: "Self, do one task today".  By framing goals as approach goals, we're much more likely to succeed because we are turning our attention to what we want to do.  In contrast, by thinking about what not to do, we are focusing on the very thing we're trying to avoid.  This is the trap of thought suppression in action: don't think about a pink elephant.

Approach

Task: Frame your productivity goals for today as approach goals.

Info: Bottom line: be nice to yourself.  You could say: "Don't procrastinate." But that's mean.  Instead, say: "Just complete that one nagging task and see how you feel."  Every time you find yourself thinking of a motivational issue in terms of avoidance, re-frame the problem in terms of approach.

Goal: Feel good about your goals for the day.

You may have noticed that I've added some advertisements to The Happy Homunculus.  Yes, I'm a sell out.  But, I also want to make some cash!  So, if you see an ad that's relevant to you, do me a favor and click, click, click!  

If clicking ads is distasteful to you, then maybe you'd like to check out The Procrastination Equation.  The book inspired all of this week's DMGs. Thanks :)

Sixty Days of Cognitive Fitness

Thanks for stopping by!  Please considering subscribing to The Happy Homunculus by RSS, email, or twitter to get all my latest musings on metacognition.

Normally, when I hear "mental fitness" I think word-puzzles, sudoku, and sequences of numbers. Basically, I think about the SAT and my homunculus gets a little queasy.

Homunky loves metacognition!

However, life is more complicated than word games. I have to motivate myself, interact with people, process new information, and stay calm enough so my friends and family don't disown me.  Instead, I need skills for dealing with life: mental toughness, optimism, self-awareness, self-control, people-skills and more. I need some metacognition up in here.

Worst Case Scenario

Caught red-handed!

My inner child.  Cute, cuddly, and cooing, right?  Wrong.  That little brat is more likely to wail, scream, scratch and bite then give me a hug.  He doesn't care if I need to work. He wants to fidget and watch youtube videos. But how do we get anything done?  By making the needs of our inner adult seem very, very important.

Just like we discussed yesterday, there's something about the future that makes it seem really UNimportant.  The importance of future events pales next to the pull of things happening right now.  When this happens - when the future seems distant - our inner child wins out.  We give in to the distractions and temptations that are here, now, at the expense of our long-term goals.

To combat this, we're going to make the future feel more real, more pressing, and really, really scary.

Worst Case Scenario

Task: Visualize the worst possible thing that might happen if you don't get your work done.

Info: The idea here is to imagine the worst possible outcome of not working.  Really go dark and scary for this visualization task.  Here's what I might imagine as I try to motivate myself to work toward my Ph.D:  As I continue to put off important experiments, the days tick past, one-by-one.  I do the very minimum each day and don't think carefully about how to schedule my time to keep myself busy and make progress.  Experiments take two or three times as long as necessary.  Because I never make time for work, I barely make progress day-to-day, month-to-month, and, eventually, year-to-year.  Before I know it, I'm in my 15th year of my Ph.D. program with no papers and no hope of getting a job.  Finally, my committee decides my lack of progress is unacceptable, but instead of giving me a Ph.D. out of pity, I am kicked out of the program with nothing to show.  Yikes.

Goal: Make the negative outcomes that might result from procrastination feel as immediate and real as possible.

For some, this scare-tactic may be demotivating: the seriousness of the situation makes them freeze.  To avoid this, pair this challenge with previous Daily Mind Games to keep things fun and moving forward.  After today's "Worst Case Scenario", go right into "High Contrast" and imagine the positive outcomes that will come from working hard.  Then, "Divide and Conquer" and complete one task that seems "Too Easy".  Rinse and repeat until you're awesome!

High Contrast

Don't let time pass you by.

Our homunculi are really short-sighted.  They are basically little monkeys: it's about right now, me, here, now.  I'm hungry, now!  I'm bored, now! I'm tired, now! Unfortunately, today's "now" doesn't last forever, and before we know it, what was once "the distant future" becomes "now" and we must live with the consequences of our actions.  Perhaps it is time to help our little, impulsive inner-monkeys visualize what the future could be like.

One strategy for increasing our motivation to get to work, now, is to contrast our current state with our dream future state.  This can work for any goal that we're procrastinating on: what is your life like right now, and what do you want it to be like?

High Contrast

Task: Compare and contrast your current state with your dream state.

Info: This is a visualization exercise, so find a nice, quiet spot.  What do you need motivation to do? Get to work?  Lose weight? Start a new business?  Whatever it might be, visualize your life right now.  Really picture in your mind all the aspects of your life, right now that are not ideal.  Then, start to visualize how your life could be if only you accomplished the goal of your choosing.  What would be different about your life?  How would it feel on a daily basis after you've completed the goal?  Really try to visualize all the awesome stuff that will come your way if you can accomplish your goal.  This exercise is known as mental contrasting and serves to remind our impulsive sides that there are discrepancies between what we are now and what we want to be.  This can be a powerful motivator to get back on task.  Give it a try!

Goal: Spend 10minutes visualizing your current state and 10minutes contrasting that with your "dream" state.

As a small aside, try not to think about everything you need to do to get from your current state to your dream state - that can often be overwhelming.  Instead, use a vivid, visualized dream state as a tasty carrot pulling you to get back to work.  Then divide and conquer, and do one easy thing to get a step closer to your goal. Rinse and repeat!

Week of Motivation

You can do it!

We're intrinsically motivated here at The Happy Homunculus.  We're so intrinsically motivated, that we were able to make ourselves more motivated.  Dios mio!

During the last week, we started arguing with our own mind with the goal of increasing our intrinsic motivation.  We completed six Daily Mind Games, inspired by the book Motivational Interviewing, that were carefully engineered to re-frame our internal biases and make us more open to changing our behavior.

I know it worked for me.  My homunculus said it worked for him.  So, why wouldn't it work for you?

Week of Motivation

Day 1: Benefits of Change - talk up the good reasons to change.
Day 2: No to the Status Quo - remind yourself why not changing is uncool.
Day 3: Characteristics for Change - note your skillz.
Day 4: Expertise for Change - get more skillz.
Day 5: Intention to Change - make a promise to yourself.
Day 6: Small Change - Make a change, a small change.

Next week, our goal will be to improve our moods (and our performance) by working on being more optimistic. I recently read a great book entitled Learned Optimism by Martin Seligman that reviews the current science about optimism and how we can change our thinking to be more optimistic.  The Daily Mind Games for next week have been inspired by this book.

What's the point you may ask?  Well, an optimistic style of thinking has been linked to improved mood, better health, longer life, and greater success.  Neat-O!  Sounds like something my homunculus could use...

Links: Check out other Weeks of Metacognition

Small Change

Thank you, internet, for this
breakdancing ninja monkey!

Are you so totally jazzed up about making a big change in your life that you've been chest-bumping yourself in the mirror?  You're not alone.  Even my homunculus is starting to believe that a positive change is possible.  He was break-dancing in my dome into the wee hours of the night.

I alluded to this earlier, but let me remind you that by thinking differently about how we might motivate ourselves, we have made a change already - in our thinking.  That is no small thing.  Being able to change how we think is a major metacognitive skill.  So, pat your homunculus on the back... With your mind!

Today, we're going to add a +1 to our "things we've changed" list.  Specifically, the goal of this Daily Mind Game, is to make one small change today that gets you a little closer to that goal you've been staring down.

Small Change

Task: Make one small change.

Info: Choose one tiny thing to change today that moves you toward your goal.  It can be a very, very small change!  Walk for 5 minutes. Drink one fewer can of soda.  Smoke one less cigarette. Do one nagging unfinished task.  The point of this exercise is not to make a huge number of changes.  Resist the temptation to do that.  Instead, pick one, atomic-level thing from your plan and make sure you stick to it.  If you do, then you have proven to yourself that you can change your own behavior.  That is the bee's knees.

Goal: Change your behavior in some way.  Pick something you will not fail at!

Congrats, you've changed: rinse and repeat and you're a different person. Seriously.

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Intention to Change

I think I know what you're thinking, and I'm thinking the same thing: I am ready to make it happen.  I'm ready to change my life for the better.  This week, we've already done so much to get our brains ready to make a big change.  Now we know: 1) that a change will be awesome, 2) not changing would be dumb, 3) we're able to make a change, and 4) the facts about changing.  Guess what my friend-in-metacogntion?  We already have made a change: in the way we think!  So cool.

Expertise for Change

Good work this week!  Oh, I was talking to myself, but I'm sure you're doing well too.  You do realize that I can't see you right..?  Wait, what was I talking about?  Oh yes, motivation!

Characteristics for Change

Better get your change ready.

The head of the homunculus in my head is spinning!  Maybe it's because of all the self-referential jokes I've been making, but I'm pretty sure it's because I finally called the little jerk out on his resistance to change.  He's been arguing for awhile that we really want to turn our lives around, but that it's just not possible:  "Sorry, chief, we've done everything we can...  Guess it's time to relax."

"Not so fast!" Says I to myself.  "I'm smarter than you [talking to myself, again], and I know that the real reason we haven't made that big change is because we're ambivalent about changing."  I hope you've been having similar conversations with yourself (although, not out loud).  Today, we're going to continue think about motivation and add one more layer to our growing sense that change is inevitable.

The goal for this Daily Mind Challenge is to get pumped up about changing by thinking about how we have what it takes to change.  We've been writing a lot of lists this week in order to focus on the reasons change is good.  Hate to say it, but we're writing another list today, but this time it's about ourselves.

Characteristics for Change

Task: Bring that main goal to mind that will require you to change your behavior. Brainstorm a list of all the characteristics you possess that make you suited to change.

Info: This is a bit of an awkward challenge since we're forced to get all sweet and syrupy with ourselves.  If you're modest, this can be one of the more difficult types of challenges.  But, remember, you're not trying to lie to yourself here, or be cocky.  Simply identify some facts about yourself, or remember some examples in the past, that provide evidence for why you would be able to make a change if you decided to.  Examples you could use might include: "I'm open to the possibility that change is feasible", "I'm smart enough to trick myself into changing", "I've completed long-term projects in other contexts", etc.

Goal: Create a list of at least 5 characteristics about yourself that make you suited to handling a change.  It's ok to use the three examples I provided above if you feel stuck.  Don't give up!  And remember to show yourself compassion...

Author's note: Are the challenges during this Week of Motivation inspiring you? Well, these posts have been inspired by the book Motivational Interviewing, Second Edition: Preparing People for Change.  Buy the book  via the link and you'll be supporting the Happy Homunculus.  We have no affiliation with the authors!

No to the Status Quo

Yesterday, you, me, and our homunculi came to the conclusion that we aren't as motivated to change our lives as we thought.  Instead, we're pretty ambivalent about the whole thing.  One the one hand, we want the rewards that come with carrying out change; yet, on the other hand, change is HARD, yo!  Do the benefits outweigh the costs?  Today, we're going to stick with more change-focused metacognition to convince ourselves that changing is the only option.